its been a tough week for me. there are times i wonder why i blog. there are times i wonder who i am. life at times can feel a little bit scary, and I've found that blogging can sometimes feel comforting. and reassuring. i like to know i am alive in the world. that i exist.
really sick of all the stuff on instagram. can't handle one more inspirational quote.
I've decided to do some traveling. well, with chase as co pilot, of course. just tiny excursions. day trips. got to beat the weirdness of life sans alice. we will discover small towns, and hidden gems and sleep in my car, or something like that. weekends etc.
yep.
enjoying the last scraps of cool weather. going to miss my winter uniform. heavy, scratchy wool cigarette pants with a very heavy thick turtleneck. my hat is truly my security blanket. ever since i got it one rainy night in new orleans two years ago at goring bros. it has been almost glued to my head ever since.
planted some seeds on the windowsill
cosmos
basil
finally got rid of the unwatched tv set on my dresser tonight. more space for pretty stuff now.
got tickets for nick caves question answer thingy here in brooklyn in may. i think its called conversations with nick. sounded too intriguing to pass up. love him. he's deep, you know? don't think i really have a question for him though. expecting to be enlightened about something or other. gotta love a weird, suave nerd.
got dita von teese tickets for may as well. now that show is going to be a B L A S T...
going to channel my inner tranny for that one, even though i am a straight woman.
go figure.
love,
cynthia xoxo
Cynthia
ReplyDeleteFor starters, we are not even going to discuss the matter of your writing, for the simple reason that you are just too good to walk away from it, well, that, and there IS the whole therapy angle to consider.
This world is awfully big, awfully impersonal, awfully unforgiving, and relentless, and so it is certainly good to get that validation, to get that yes you do matter, that yes you do exist kickback.
On being alone, gosh, boy can I certainly sympathize, farm living you know. Well, by being alone most hours of the day, I have finally found someone who laughs at all my jokes – me, and someone who can actually put with me - again me. The biggest downside of my hermit lifestyle, and it may be the same for you, I don't know, is trying to remember not to talk to myself when I do go into town.
Finally, I will give you a freebee question for Mr. Cave. You could ask Nick whose version of Mercy Seat he likes better, his, or Johnny Cash’s. Regarding Dita, I would gladly trade places with you, heck, I will even go with you, having no doubts over her sexuality, or mine.
That is it for now…
xo
Kenneth
i really must sound like a loon, but i truly chat with myself all the time in public as well i am sure! I'm sure when alice was around, she didn't even listen to most of my incessant chatter...and farm living sounds like the dream. truly. love your question for nick. i think I'm going to be too shy to ask anything, but I'm sure there will be enough to keep me thinking...i was actually unable to choose between mercy seat myself being that i adore both johnny cash and nick cave each a thousand percent. xoxo
DeleteGreat words from Master Kenneth above. Since I ‘let go’ of my old life and strolled down The Road Less Travelled, I have felt freer, less worried and more alive than ever before. I’m a very sociable person but also love my own company. I adored married life and being a part of a couple, but I try not to concentrate on what I’ve lost/had. I’m never, ever lonely. Too interested in the world going on around me. I’m an avid reader, so have a cast of thousands waiting to hang out, within the pages of many an unread book. I have a wardrobe of beautiful clothes and shoes, mostly in storage. I frequently live my life out of a suitcase and take ‘home’ with me wherever I go, because it’s a feeling, not a place. Especially since my daughter left home. Step outside your comfort zone, even in a small way and breathe in new life and adventure. It helps to fill the void left empty by those we love xx MT
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