Attempts

So my surreal, weird week continues.  I booked a massage at what I thought would be a good place, thinking it would be really a good turning point with stress, and helpful for me to relax and sleep, and release tension etc, but the weirdness just had to continue.  Got something that was a complete waste of time.  Forty minutes of adjusting the massage table, and a lot of kneecap massage.  !  ???  Has anyone ever heard of such a thing?  I thought knees were supposed to be left alone?  Either way, I just kept cringing.......no aching foot was ever rubbed in this process....that would have been way too nice.  Couldn't wait to get out of the room, and I just didn't have it in me to complain. 

 The best part of the morning was just sitting with Alice afterwards in the Starbucks on Montague Street, drinking lots of bitter coffee, and staring out the dirty looking window at the dead Christmas trees lined up on the sidewalk, and basically just gossiping about anyone who passed by.  I was wearing my favorite linty black ski hat, and glasses, and yoga pants, and I was remembering Christmas Eve day four years ago, when we were sitting in the very same place, and thinking how much life has changed.....

Thought I was doing better in the tears department.  Today it seemed they were done for good, thought I was really getting better, but then with no actual thought or trigger involved....BAM....a flood of them.  Uncontrollable and crazy!  Unbelievable as it sounds, on Saturday night I have a dinner date.  While I am not even remotely excited, I was asked four times, nicely, and I am supposed to get out there right?  Even in the sad heap I am currently in?  Even if he isn't my type?  Hopefully the tear machine doesn't turn on in public, in mid conversation, because that would be a little bit awkward...not to mention insulting.

Packing for London....

Took down the tree...

Bought some boots....really nice ones.  Gianvito Rossi.  Suede.  I am a bit late to the over the knee boot party, but better late than never, right?  Perhaps I'll take them to London next week.  Leaving town is always a good way to reboot and refresh the soul.  I was thinking this would be the best thing ever, but then I remembered the ex boyfriend will be there at the same time....the plot thickens..